A PRESENT FROM ERNIE

Our dear, departed co-founder, Ernie Simpson, was clean-living, but should never be taken for a prude. When it came to other people’s foibles and lifestyles, he was the soul of discretion and acceptance.

In going through my files, I found the following, which never made it into this blog.

I don’t know whether Ernie ever “sanitized” this or not but, just to be sure, I’ve changed the other gentleman’s name. Ernie would’ve NEVER approved of me causing someone else embarrassment.

Take this as just a smiling remembrance from a very special man: he loved sharing

Sarah

The sales and marketing trip had been uneventful for both my traveling bud, George, and I, and we were anxious to get to the next stop and then soon back home. It was a nice morning, and we both were in a good mood, as we waited for the call to board the flight. George commented that he felt good about the day’s plans and was ready to get going. We both took boarding passes, and one was closer to the front of the plane, and the other was more to the rear. I asked George where he wanted to sit, and he said, ‘l’ll sit in the back.’ Fine. I took the pass closer to the front.

He said, ‘See that girl over there? I sure would like to meet her: she is really cute.’ I said, yea, right, fat chance of your getting to meet her before we left.

We boarded the plane, and I approached my assigned seat and was pleasantly surprised that the cute blond had the seat beside me. I took my seat, and George walked on by and glared at me as he went on towards the rear of the plane (like I rigged the seating or something).

We had our conversation, Sara and I. It was great. Then I realized, omigosh, here’s a chance to find out all I never knew about all this. So I asked her lots of questions, and she was delightfully cooperative in answering.

As we were making the final approach to land, I said to her, ‘You know my friend, George, is seated at the rear of the plane, and he commented to me earlier, when we were waiting for our flight, that he thought you were really cute, and he was hoping to meet you.’

She said, ‘I’d love to meet him!” She then told me her ride was going to meet her at the baggage claim, and I told her, “I’ll wait here for George, and we’ll be right along, I really want to introduce you two.” She said sure, and headed on to the baggage claim.

I waited for George to catch up to me, and he said, ‘You dog, you got to sit by that girl!’ I said, ‘George, I got to know her a little on the flight, and she is really cute and very nice, her name is Sara and I told her about you and she can’t wait to meet you.”

He said, ‘Really? Omigosh! Well, she is a knockout, and I was hoping to at least say hi to her.’ He rattled excitedly all the way to the baggage claim. Sure enough, Sara was there waiting, and I introduced them, and of course she handled it beautifully, the cutest, most charming young lady you’d ever want to meet. George was beside himself, with his good fortune and turned on his best charm. I hung back, and let him enjoy the moment. Finally our bags came, and the person picking her up came over. She said, “Well there’s my ride. Listen, you have my number and, if you’re ever in Carson City, please give me a call!” George says, “We sure will, I promise!”

She left, and he was so excited, and just went on about how nice she was, and really neat and all. As she turned the corner out of sight, I said, “George, there’s something I have to tell you.” He looked at me funny…I paused for effect, and said, ‘Sara…. is a hooker.”

He looked at me wide eyed, and shouted, “A HOOKER?!!!” You could have heard it over the whole airport.

I said yep, “Here’s a book of matches, with a map inside the cover to her place in Carson City, the Kit Kat Ranch…” Well, I’m not sure he ever got over the disappointment, but, whenever I wanted to get something over on George, I just brought up the story of Sara. I haven’t seen her since that day. Maybe she’s retired by now. I hope so.